t h e k a r m i c b o o m e r a n g -- Wednesday "This is the sex of history, this is the sound of the big wall coming down, this is the friction of joy and misery..." --Chagall Guevara Put yourself in a darkened room, as bare and barren as you can make it except for the accoutrements of ritual that you find necessary. Establish a small altar if you do not already have one; above it, or on the floor in front of it, place a sheet of ragged paper (preferably some kind of parchment or rice paper). Burn black-and-red marbled candles if you can find them (if you are in the Chicagoland area, Chiaroscuro in the Loop's Magnificent Mile carries them). If you can't, burn one black and one red. Have as much incense, in the heaviest smell you can find, burning as you can bear. Have with you a sharp knife, and a stereo system (preferrably a CD player that runs by remote control) prepared to play the song "Insanity" by Boingo (or an equally suitable song if you can find it -- the name of the game is customizing to fit circumstances). Create whatever working space you usually use -- circle, vortex, whatever works. It is your will to bring the consequences of the act of rape down upon its perpetrator. All at once. Breathe. Deeply. Draw the world in with your air. Start the music. Take the knife to one finger, and slice it open. Bringing -every- -detail- of the event to mind that you know, whether it was told to you or you are remembering what happened to you, trace a banishing pentagram with your blood on the paper. Bleed out the anger and fury and desire to wreak justice yourself onto the paper. Chant the lyrics of the song as you do this. Flood yourself with it, and become the event, channeling it in and then out. Give it the pain. Give it the agony. Give it the sense of violation, the desolation, the ache and the tearing. Give it what was given you and caused within you and triggered in you. Every. Last. Ounce.. "I'd love to take you home with me and tuck you into bed I'd love to see what makes you tick inside your pretty head I'd love to hear you laugh tonight, I'd love to hear you weep I'd love to listen to you while you're screaming in your sleep..." Become it. Be it. "Do you think you're better than me? Do you want to kill me or befriend me?... All around the world now, like a big bright cherry cloud, travelling from home to home...here it comes just like a storm, breathe it in and be reborn, time to let the world know, welcome, madness say hello..." "I'd love to hear you scream tonight, I'd love to hear you cry, Protect you from the madness that is raining from the sky..." You are linked with the paper and the blood and all of what was given is in that circuit between your hand and your blood. Take the paper and raise it to the light of the candles as the instrumental careens.... "I'd love to take you home tonight and tuck you into bed I'd love to see what makes you tick inside your pretty head I wish that I could keep you in a precious Chinese box On Sundays I would pray for you so it would never stop I'd love to hear you laugh tonight, I'd love to hear you weep I'd love to listen to you while you're screaming in your sleep, I'd love to soothe you with my voice and take your hand in mine, I'd love to take you past the stars and out of reach of time, I'd love to see your silent mind and tear it all apart, To cut you open with a knife and find your sacred heart, I'd love to take your satin dolls and tear them all to shreds, I'd love to mess your pretty hair, I'd love to see you DEAD......." Let your voice rise to a fevered scream with the last verse, and on the last word, plunge the knife into the paper and tear it in two, releasing the anger in the blood circuit directly at him. You have sent his deed and what it caused back to him, and he will have to deal with what that brings. Ground what is left inside of you, and devoke what you invoked. Sleep if you will.